Liella. Loves. Life.
I should explain, why my new blog goes by the name “Personality Disordered” and not “Flowers out of my a… ha”.
Blogging used to be my remedy against life, back when I was a troubled teenager. The times have changed, I am a grown woman, no longer web-designing, Michael Jackson is dead and people make vlogs nowadays and become YouTube stars.
Some things remain intact, though:
For one, I am still quite alive (though approximately once every month I wake up in strange places and feel very dead - I don’t get, why they say hangover, it’s so much more like a lifeover).
Second I am still a little troubled. Actually they’ve come up with a name for it: It’s called BPD and it obviously doesn’t require me to hear voices, see things or talk to my imaginary friends in public.
Uh well, big deal. I’m not as cool as Donnie Darko yet, not too many people notice and my mother believes I am possessed by the Devil.
On the contrary life has become more fun. It is amazing, how many people would confide in you, when you tell them you are seeing a therapist - it’s kinda like I was hosting a weird sort of coming out party.
I openly indulge my passion for the irony and absurdities of human behavior, culture and history.
From my experience these days, I’d say that borderline behavior is everywhere. The human race is changing and depression and actual personality disorders, as well as other psychological conditions are mere by-products. The real madness is going on with society as a whole, while it’s trying to give birth to the next level of understanding and co-existence. And… yeah, whatever.
It’s not dramatic, it’s not a 2012-thing and it can probably be categorized under evolution… of the mind, maybe, but it’s still evolution, so it’s old and it has a beard. Back to my ass!
The last couple of months have been a bit of a rush and I am currently taking it veeeery slow. I’ve taken a break a week ago, having been a little sick and currently night is day and day is night. I love being on http://twitter.com/liella and of course my old-school super anonymous http://facebook.com/notyourkindagirl when online. Offline I am avoiding crowds and prefer being alone with movies, books and the likes. Sometimes I do nothing or simply cry because it’s not all fun and games and that’s just the way it is.
I have HOWEVER painted my face last night and then went out to scare some people.
Looking good?
I do a lot of other things, but that will be another tale to tell.
Bye for now.
Li
